If my parent went to australia when i was 14 and still lives their am I a australian citizen then?

Your mother does not understand Australian law. Your father had to be an Australian citizen on the day you were born for you to be an Australian citizen. If he became a citizen after this time, it make no impact on your citizenship at all. You are 23 and even if your mother died now, you would not be able to move to Australia as a citizen - you would have to apply for a migration visa (i.e. be skilled in an area of need) or marry and Australian to move here.